The Christian Right/LDS School Board Enigma

The future of Capo Unified hangs by a terrifying thread. Awkward questions about faith, politics and education linger.

So a few weeks ago, a woman named Mandy Bourne filed papers to enter the upcoming race for a spot on the Capo Unified School District’s board. She is running for the Trustee Area 6 seat occupied by Gila Jones, a well-regarded moderate. And, if one visits Bourne’s website, they will find what appears to be a run-of-the-mill local parent trying to make the world a better place. And, I suppose, it’s possible Mandy Bourne is a run-of-the-mill local parent trying to make the world a better place. I mean, truly, who the heck knows?

But …

There’s this thing that now hangs over the Capo Unified School District’s board like a moldy sheet. It starts with Lisa Davis, the board president, a Bluto-level bully and a toxin to the ideals of normal public education. It extends to Jennifer Adnams, a board member and, well, also a toxin to the ideals of normal public education. What it is is … eh, um, dogma. Hard-right dogma. Hard-right religious dogma. Hard-right religious dogma that thrusts forward a singular world view that begins and ends with an adherence to the principles of Jesus Christ’ supposed teachings. Hard-right religious dogma that thrusts forward a singular world view that begins and ends with an adherence to the principles of Jesus Christ’ supposed teachings—and (in the minds of these women) belongs inside our public schools.

And if you know not whereof I speak, take a moment or two and listen to this episode of the Kingdom Alliance podcast, which features Adnams (a uniquely vapid woman) explaining her perspective on things. It’s creepy AF; a reminder that, among us, walk a species of homo sapiens who believe they exist to input God’s seed within our brains. That everything (literally everything) they do concerns converting non-believers into believers.

Hell, if that’s not enough for you, take some more time and watch this unwatchable episode of Jack Hibbs’ podcast, which brings forth the weirdness of Davis, Adnams and Lisa Zollinger—three Capo Unified Board members.

If you’re wondering, what does this all have to do with Mandy Bourne running for School Board, it’s this: Bourne is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Which, in an isolation chamber, should 100-percent not be an issue. If you live in Orange County, you surely know Mormons. And like Mormons. They’re on your kid’s little league team, in your kid’s dance class. They tell jokes, complain, recommend restaurants, even (on occasion) curse. Like any religion, some Mormons are all in on the faith, some are half in, some think it’s a stupid waste of time. They’re people who fart and spit and sleep and eat, just like anyone else.

I wanna reiterate that, before I continue: They’re people, just like anyone else [Don’t believe me? Giants quarterback Jaxon Dart is LDS. And that dude can throw a 70-yard spiral].

But … here’s the twist: While, in the real world, religious identity is just a thing, on the Capo Unified School Board shit is beginning to get disconcertingly weird and wild and Stepford-like. If Bourne winds up winning, she will become (alongside Davis and Lisa Zollinger) the third LDS Board member, and that trio will (recent history suggests) align with Adnams, who exists to make us all believe as she does.

A brief pause for two spoonfuls of Jennifer Adnams creepiness …

If you’ve been paying attention, this all sounds fmailiar. You know Lisa Davis is a dim-witted, power-hungry lunatic who attended a MAGA rally, sported a MAGA hat and was in on the Gays Against Groomers dude fucking up a meeting last year. You know Adnams is of the same political ilk. You know Zollinger is (sorta) of the same ilk—though, to her credit, she occasionally seems annoyed by her zealot cronies and desperately wants to go home and watch “Love Island.” You know having four of these people on the School Board is Game Over for a reasoned approach to education. You know it’s zealotry come to life. You know it’s profoundly bad news.

You also know the local conservative churches (LDS included) have become significantly more involved in OC school board elections. They are encouraging parishioners to fight, encouraging them to give money, encouraging them to run for office and volunteer their time and put God first and thrust Him into our academics; to take the lessons of Prager University and apply them to the local scene. They are, with no known exceptions, 100 percent on the MAGA train, with an emphasis on liberals being the woke enemies of Godliness who need to be defeated at all costs. For fuck’s sake, I’ve seen a photo of these peeps leaning against a public school building, praying into the brick foundation. Put different: To them, it’s not a joke—it’s a holy war for our children.

Enter: Mandy Bourne.

Now, I have yet to speak with Mandy, or hear her speak. I know what you might know about her: She lists herself as NPP (No Party Preference). Her husband, Troy, is a member of the San Juan Capistrano City Council. They have a gaggle of kids, all of whom have been educated in public schools. I say this sincerely: She seems likable and kind, and I hope (truly hope) my concerns and suspicions are the ramblings of a anxiety-riddled sports writer who has been listening to too much Bebe Rexha.

Seriously: I hope she’s awesome.

However, there is a track record around here that gives me the willies. When Davis, Adnams and Zollinger ran for their spots, they presented (like Bourne) as these happy-happy, lovey-lovey OC moms who just wanna embrace life and promote positive energy. They handed out stickers and bubbles; smiled nonstop; expressed love for teachers and learning and … and …

It all led to the worst academic-based culture war any of us have had the misfortune of experiencing.

Hell, it all led to a school district on the verge of catastrophe.

Seriously, shit has gotten dark. Really dark. There are suspicions Davis wants Dr. Christopher Brown, the district superintendent and a dude liked by most reasonable people, out. There have been choreographed stunts during Board meetings that were simultaneously performative and grotesque. There’s a Prager U spirit that doesn’t belong in public education. Seriously, it’s bad.

So what I think we need, in a genuine spirit of openness, is for Mandy Bourne to answer some legitimate questions.

Among them …

• 1. What role do you believe religion should play in public education?

• 2. Can you commit to supporting Dr. Brown?

• 3. Have you spoken with Lisa Davis about any agendas? If so, which?

• 4. What are your thoughts on diversity and inclusion?

• 5. How do you feel about LGBTQ+ students and families?

• 6. How do you feel about closing and/or merging schools?

• 7. How can we lower the temperature surrounding School Board conflicts and bullying?

• 8. Do you identify as MAGA? If so, why?

I’m not saying the give and take will solve anything. I’m not even saying—with 100-percent certainty—that it’ll help.

But it can be a start.