What the actual hell?
Young Kim has found Jesus. Political Jesus.
So Young Kim sent out an e-mail the other day. It was beautiful, in the you’re-walking-past-a-bunch-of-religious-zealots-at-the-mall-and-they-start-barking-at-you sort of way.
Here’s her message …
If you’re wondering why Young Kim—never overly religious, never one to proselytize—has found Jesus, it’s because she’s running for her CA-40 life. Not against Democrats, sadly, but vs. Ken Calvert, the reigning CA-41 congressman who has been wedged into her (now ultra-conservative) district. Post Prop-50, the two wackadoos are positioning themselves to be as batshit nutty right wing as possible. This includes ultra-Christian views and expressions of faith.
You think Ken Calvert loves Christ? Lemme tell you about Jesus!
You think Young Kim is MAGA? I once stuck my finger up Donald Trump’s rectum, just to feel the joy!
You think Ken Calvert stuck his finger up Donald Trump’s rectum to feel the joy? No—he did so trying to kill our lord! When I stick my finger up Donald Trump’s rectum, it’s out of love for Christ!
On.
And on.
And on.
And on.
Alas, either Kim or Calvert will wind up winning this hellscape of an election. It’s a certainty, and nothing fools fools like expressions of false faith.
Then, the two can set Christ aside and resume their lives as mediocre political hacks begging for money and serving a president who fucked around with teenagers.
In Jesus’ name.
Amen.