Cruelty comes (and goes) from Laguna Niguel

It always happens to someone else. Until it happens to you.

Gladys and Nelson González

In case you missed this heartbreaking story, earlier this month a Laguna Niguel couple that had lived in the United States for 35 years was snatched up and kicked out.

Their names are Gladys and Nelson González. They came from Colombia in 1989 via the San Ysidro border crossing between San Diego and Tijuana, seeking a better life. They have three daughters. They have multiple grandchildren. Gladys, 55, was a homemaker. Nelson, 59, worked at a laboratory. Their records were free of any/all crimes.

On Feb. 21, in what was supposed to be a routine check-in, the two visited ICE offices to review the nuances of their status in the United States. Instead of an appreciative breakdown, Gladys and Nelson were (to their great shock) held and sent to a private immigration jail in San Bernardino. “The only thing they were told was that they had exhausted their stay,” their daughter, Stephanie, told El País. “This, despite the fact that they managed to extend their permit to be in the country every year and that they are law-abiding citizens who have never hidden from the authorities.”

For two wholes weeks, the González daughters heard nothing. They knew not if Gladys and Nelson were dead or alive, safe or in trouble. Their parents were ultimately taken to a detention center in Arizona, then Louisiana, then sent back to Colombia—a nation that had not been home since “Rain Man” won Best Picture.

And if you’re one of these people who thinks, “Hey, well, they were illegal …” ask yourself this—why are you here?

Or, more important: How are you here?

I’ll go first: I’m here because of womb placement. Womb placement. My great-grandmother was gassed in Auschwitz. My grandparents escaped Nazi Germany and came to New York City. Their daughter (my mom) was born here. And, therefore, I was born here. I have never served a day in the military; have never done a whole lot of note for this nation. I am as deserving or undeserving of my citizenship as anyone else.

With that self-awareness comes an appreciation of people who seek out America for a better life.¹ Anyone with a base-level understanding of late-1980s Colombia can appreciate why people like Gladys and Nelson González did their all to leave. The drug cartels ruled much of the land; violence was oftentimes a door or two away. Kidnappings skyrocketed. Or, put differently: If it were you, Mr. MAGA Cap, and you could try and sneak into a land of milk and honey, or stay still and watch your wife get kidnapped and murdered by a cartel, what would you do?

Seriously, what would you do?

Alas now, under Donald Trump, context and history and background and intent no longer matter. Your reasons for coming here are insignificant. Your intentions are worthless pulp. Whether you’re a Blood or a blood donor makes no difference. Tom Homan, the new border czar, lathers in the fear as one does a soapy bath. He loves it. Craves it. Pursues it.

There is a scene in the original “Karate Kid” where Daniel LaRusso is chased down by the sinister members of Cobra Kai. They’re dressed in skeleton costumes—five aspiring ICE agents amped up and itching to kick the shit out of the brown kid. They catch him at a fence, bloody him up …

Although I can neither confirm nor deny this fact, I would bet my house, my car and my Dave Fleming baseball card collection that, in their younger says, Trump, Homan, J.D. Vance, Elon Musk and at least 73 members of the Republican congressional delegation considered the 49-second sequence to be Grade-A mom-and-dad-are-out-for-the-night masturbatory material.² They jerk off to this shit.

Hence, in 2025, the cruelty is the point. And while Donald Trump’s supporters can smile and laugh and kneel before their king, people like Gladys and Nelson González have been ripped from their families and sent back to a homeland that isn’t a homeland.

If you feel satisfied in that knowledge, you’re not merely mean.

You’re sinister.

1. Although, lord knows, who would wanna come here these days?

2. That Daniel-san was wearing the jersey of Black Chargers wide receiver Wes Chandler only fed the titillation