A clear and sober look at the CA-40 race

Last night's League of Women Voters Debate Showed Lisa Ramirez has the game. If only (sigh) she had the dough ...

In the spring of 1998, while working as a baseball writer for Sports Illustrated, I headed over to Chain of Lakes Park in Winter Haven, Fla. to interview Dwight Gooden, one of my boyhood heroes.

Back in the day, when I was a wee lad in New York, Gooden was an iconic Big Apple baseball figure, with a Rookie of the Year trophy and a Cy Young Award trophy and a shiny World Series championship ring. He boasted a high leg kick and a blistering fastball and a curveball that shattered the equilibrium of opposing batters.

But now, in ‘98, Gooden was a shell. He’d battled substance abuse problems, lost velocity, lost confidence. He’d bounced from the Mets to the Yankees to (ugh) the Indians, and at 33-years old looked beaten and battered and lost.

I, however, wanted to believe.

I shook Gooden’s hand and asked, “Do you still feel like you have the old Doc Gooden in you? Can you be that guy again? Can you!?”

He nodded, whispered, “Of course”—then left to jog toward the field. But, deep down, we both knew the truth. As badly as I wanted the hands of time to rewind a decade, it wasn’t realistic. The Dwight Gooden of my youth was long gone. He was just an aging Major League has-been.

Reality (almost) always wins.

•••

I bring this up because, last night, I drove to Santa Ana to attend a CA-40 candidate forum at the Church of the Foothills. I was anxious to see the three leading Democrats—Esther Kim Varet, Joe Kerr and Lisa Ramirez—engage for perhaps the final time before the June 2 primary (from which the top two overall finishers of all entrants advance to the November general election).

When I pulled into the lot and parked, this was the site that greeted me …

Then, a few minutes later, this was the site that greeted me …

That’s Kerr on the far left, Ramirez next to him, (inexplicable) independent Nina Linh next to her and … um … eh … ah …

Francis Xavier Hoffman on the far right.

If you’re wondering, “Wait. Who the fuck is Francis Xavier Hoffman?”—I, too, was wondering, “Wait. Who the fuck is Francis Xavier Hoffman?” The man has never before attended a CA-40 debate. He has neither candidate profile nor website. He wore a suit and a tie and had color to his skin, thereby eliminating the possibility that, like this Francis Xavier Hoffman, he’s been dead for 84 years.

I am guessing the not-deceased Francis Xavier Hoffman either: A. Lied and said, “I’m with the band.” B. Slipped the bouncer $20. C. Exclaimed, “Hey, I’m Esther Kim Varet!” and walked on through.

Whatever the case, while Francis Xavier Hoffman sat at the long table on the stage, Esther (unlike her van) was MIA (we were told there was a family issue).

Bummer.

The 1 1/2 hour forum was … eh, OK. Not amazing. Not terrible. Just, OK.

The turnout was depressingly small …

… and the questions—most of which were submitted by attendees—felt flat and regurgitated, like four-day old chicken breast. There were the typical inquiries about Trump, about government overreach, about gas prices. Hoffman did his best Admiral Stockdale; Linh stumbled over the basics (For the life of me, I have never understood why she’s doing this), Kerr was (as always) solid, steady, confident, well-spoken.

And then there was Lisa Ramirez.

Who.

Was.

Friggin’.

Awesome.

A veteran immigration attorney and first-time office seeker, Ramirez knows how to pump up a room (even a 70-percent empty one). Her answers were crisp, sharp, to the point. She speaks with a refreshing level of candor, admits when she’s unsure, doesn’t interrupt her opponents. She’s quick with facts, with data, with information. Seriously, since starting The Truth OC 1 1/2 years ago, I’ve attended far too many of these events. And I thought, last night, Lisa Ramirez was as good as it gets. When the affair ended, I asked a bunch of people (none of whom I knew) who they thought won the show—and every single one named Lisa.

She was that fantastic.

•••

If the preceding few paragraphs make me sound happy, well, you’ve misread. I’m actually not happy about CA-40. To be honest, I’m gutted.

I’ve been following this race dating back to the ol’ Perry Meade-Paula Swift days, and I believe Lisa Ramirez is—in an isolation chamber where only decency, experience and grit matter—the best candidate. She’s the most likable candidate. She’s the most refreshing candidate. Her career and Latina heritage make her an intriguing pick for these ICE-bombarded times in a 23-percent Latino district. She can speak to the issues we face with moral clarity.

Seriously, she’s The Package. I truly believe that.

But …

She has very little money.

Like, v-e-r-y little.

And … fuck. Fuckity fuck. Driving home from the event last night, I reached out to two people I know and trust who have deep political ties and vast understandings of local races. I asked them to paint me a picture of how Lisa Ramirez, a tremendous candidate with but $324,014 in her campaign, can somehow pull an in-a-month upset and wind up in the Top 2 of a plus-nine Republican district that was rejiggered after Prop 50.

The replies were grim. In short, she would need a political miracle. It would take, in some manner, the Republicans Young Kim and Ken Calvert narrowing themselves down to one and (simultaneously) Esther Kim Varet either last-minute relocating to Guam or holding a press conference to announce she enjoys murdering small cats and feeding them to the Marilyn Monroe corpse she stole from the Westwood Village Memorial Park & Mortuary.

Put simply (and glumly), the v-a-s-t majority of voters will learn of the candidacies of Young Kim, Ken Calvert, Esther Kim Varet, Joe Kerr and Lisa Ramirez via (those profoundly) annoying mailers and (those equally annoying) lawn signs. And while Lisa has very much upped her social media game, well … eh … money (and money alone) buys the most name recognition and exposure. It just does, in ways self-generated Tweets and TikToks cannot. Which, obviously, sucks.

It really sucks.

•••

This leads to a fascinating question: What to do?

I will inevitably receive another 17 nasty e-mails or texts for this, but Esther Kim Varet’s campaign is a tsunami of slop. It’s … it’s—I don’t even know precisely how to describe it, but it sorta reminds me of the time, as a college freshman, I drank a ton of grape MD 20/20, ran to the toilet, vomited everywhere and had the dirty toilet water splash back onto my face. It’s disorganized, chaotic, weird, cruel. There’s a lot of shit talk, a ton of staff upheaval, an inability to learn from mistakes and a (perplexing) need to remind voters of wealth and status. It’s felt more like an effort to purchase love than a desire to inspire hope. Something has been missing from Day One. A humanity. A humility. And before anyone from the campaign jumps all over me (yet again), just know that, oh, multiple times per week, someone new DMs me via Instagram to complain about a latest offense. I am not making this shit up.

That being said …

Esther Kim Varet has money. She doesn’t have Young Kim or Ken Calvert money, but she has enough to at least put up a fight and get her name out there over the next month. And … honestly, I don’t even know what to think/feel. With a little bit more self-reflection, and a willingness to not fire back at every Instagram critic with three followers and a profile picture of a puppy, Esther could theoretically/possibly/maybe possess a puncher’s chance. I mean, people are uniquely angry right now. And the efforts of Calvert and Kim to go as MAGA as possible might prove costly in a general against a Democrat. And Harley Rouda did shock Dana Rohrabacher. And Katie Porter did shock Mimi Walters. And … and … and …

I don’t know.

On the one hand, I think back to the words of Andy Van Slyke, Pittsburgh Pirates outfielder, after Barry Bonds left the team to sign with San Francisco. “You know,” Van Slyke said to a reporter, “I’d rather lose without Barry than win with him.” Sometimes, I feel that way about Esther Kim Varet. Maybe I’d rather lose without her than win with her. Maybe another two years of Young Kim wouldn’t be so awful, if it means ignoring a toxic Democratic candidate. Maybe we go with a Ramirez or Kerr, acknowledge the likely loss but feel principled in the decision.

Or …

Maybe desperate times call for desperate action. Maybe we suck it up, hold our nose, vote for Esther Kim Varet and hope for the best. Maybe, even if it feels unsightly, it’s a decision of necessity; of ridding the political world of another Donald Trump stooge. Maybe Esther Kim Varet isn’t the ideal choice, but the most logical one in an illogical moment in America.

•••

If you’ve read this far, seeking a definitive answer, bad news. I don’t have one.

I think Lisa Ramirez is the best candidate we have.

I think Lisa Ramirez lacks the finances to win.

I think Esther Kim Varet is the worst candidate we have.

I think Esther Kim Varet has the finances to put up a fight.

I think the world is imperfect.

I think politics suck.

I think I need a nap and a shot of MD 20/20.