What will Sonja Shaw and Amber Smith do now?

Knit? Bowl? Pottery? Form an Indigo Girls fan club? So much free time, so many options.

With her goal accomplished, Sonja Shaw takes her next step: Joining the Village People and endorsing their clean, masculine messaging.

First, the good news!

America has been saved! Society has been salvaged! God is good and God is great and everything bad in the world is now wonderful!

Yes!

According to multiple news reports, California will no longer allow trans athletes to compete in girls sports. This, from Fox News’ Jackson Thompson …

And, from an athletic standpoint, I don’t really care. Of all the issues impacting America right now, trans athletes-in-high school-sports ranks 8,654,322nd on my priority list, waaaaay behind, oh, the demise of democracy and the dismantling of science and free thought. It has been, from jump, a wedge issue; a magical distractor Republicans can use so MAGA lemmings pay little-to-no attention to the tariff shit-show, to Pete Hegseth’s staggering inability, to a federal government in absolute disarray. As I noted in an earlier post, were people legitimately concerned for fairness in youth sports, they’d focus on PED, on age disparities, on $1,000 pitching coaches for rich kids. On stuff that (cough) impacts more than seven people.

But, again, this has been a wedge issue from jump. A sadly successful one.

I digress.

The two SoCal people leading the trans-athletes-are-ruining-everything charge have been Sonja Shaw (who uses her name) and a realtor(?) named Amber Smith (who cowers in the shadows while tossing poison-tipped darts). As we speak, Shaw is running for California State Superintendent, and this ban will certainly boost her standing among residents who support publicly shaming a child athlete and the child athlete’s mother (as she did at a recent track and field meet). Also as we speak, Smith (again, sans name) runs the Reform CAPO Instagram feed—a place that puts the koo in kooks and traffics in all sorts of wackadoo I’m-a-vaccine-hating-mom-with-too-much-free-time-on-my-hands conspiracy theory.

And, now, I worry about both women. With the state ban, who will Shaw track down and berate? What teenager will she flog in person? What parent will she damn to hell—in Jesus’ name? What will Smith post about, if there’s no kid to ridicule? If there’s no mother to reduce to smelt and chud? Will the ladies team up to infiltrate the underground Orange County drag show circuit? Will they barge into libraries and make certain this text is burned to the ground? Will they become Cub Scout den mothers, comb through the group’s guide book and realize the first six paragraphs spell out H-A-N-D-J-O-B? Will they research the origin story of the Village People’s “YMCA” and gasp in horror?

I don’t know.

But today isn’t about hypotheticals. It’s about winning!

California’s trans teen athlete will no longer be changing in the girls’ room while stealing tampons, quoting Emily Dickinson and plotting the deflowering of 17 virgins. She has been stopped!

Sleep well, Sonja and Amber.

The world is now safe.