Feeling blue (sad) in Capo

An amazing election season—with a major bummer.

Let’s open up our history books …

I have two kids.

One is 23 and in grad school.

One is 20 and an undergrad.

I am incredibly happy they are no longer students in Capsitrano Unified.

So incredibly happy.

•••

I say this to not take away the joy of the blue tsunami, but to speak truth about my local school district, which somehow hasn’t received the memo that Sonja Shaw is nuts, the Moms For Liberty movement is cratering and nobody is sneaking into the nearby high school library to masturbate over faded photos of Linda Carter.

As we speak, it looks as if a MAGA hard-right majority is going to add at least one—and maybe two—additional culture warriors to the board, possibly leaving the valiant-yet-outgunned Krista Castellanos all alone defending the left flank. And the race that shocks me (like, profoundly shocks me) is the now-inevitable triumph of Linda Shepard, who is boot stomping Ron Ruef in the fight for Trustee Area 7 …

I’ve never met Shepard, but I’ve heard enough to know she’s one of those people who sets aside a book when it includes a cuss; who believes we need to closer monitor teachers and keep a sharp eye on the dreaded trans kids and their homo-neurotic tendencies.

Hell, here’s a little something from her IG feed a day or two back …

•••

So, yeah. Life is imperfect.

But I’m gonna say a few things, and I mean them all:

1. Props to Lisa Davis, the school board president, for figuring this thing out. I’m actually being sincere. Even though I think Davis is a ruinous, incurious lunatic, she’s also transformed the board into her incurious lunatic image. I mean it—she has played her hand very well and worked the system as a seasoned pro. That does take some political savvy and smarts.

2. Elections have consequences. Scores of people don’t pay attention to school board elections. They see a familiar name from a sign, and check the box. Or don’t vote at all. So, like, if you’re a Capo parent, and you didn’t head to the polls, and in a few months all the Sandra Boynton books are being pulled because there’s a naked elephant … bruh, don’t look at me. And don’t look at Krista. And don’t look at Lisa Davis or Linda Shepard.

   Look in the mirror.

3. I’m intrigued by Mandy Bourne, also a new member of the board. Mandy is certainly conservative, and she’s the wife of San Juan Capistrano Mayor Troy Bourne (a Republican). But … she actually seems legitimately thoughtful and not easily swayed. I’m not saying she’ll be Malcolm X—but I can’t imagine she places her marbles entirely with Lisa. She’s too smart for that.

4. Entering the midterms, I was hoping things had gotten sooo bad people would wake up. And, just maybe, that has to happen here. Let’s dig into creationism in school. Let’s add a Christian prayer or two. Let’s tell some gay parents they’re living immorally. Could this be the depths before the rise?

   One can always hope.

5. We need better candidates. I know … I know. It’s unfair and mean and cruel. But if I’m keeping it real, there was a bit of pizzazz and flash lacking on the left. When you live in fairly conservative turf (as we do), you need more than just nice people. It sucks, but it’s true. You need electricity. You need heat. You need people who bring the thunder and lightning.

   This all felt sort of … sleepy.

And now, I need to sleep.

•••

PS: Congrats to Linda and Mandy. I’m being sincere. Even if I disagree with what someone stands for, these races are hard and these gigs are thankless. So maybe they’ll surprise me. Even if they don’t, they took the time to run—and they won. Mazel.